Under the Weather

I've been very under the weather this last week. I've been dealing with a great deal of nausea throughout the week. If I hadn't had a blood test a little over a week ago, I would swear that I'm pregnant. To top that off, Thursday night I came down with a cold that I caught from a co-worker. Oh the joys!! So I've been all snotty and sneezing this weekend. With all of this I haven't been up to too much activity.

Mark and I continue to seek direction for the next step in the journey to expand our family. I had a MASSIVE meltdown last week. The worst in a long time. This is just so hard! It makes it even harder that Mark and I really aren't on the same page about things. He is perfectly content with our family as it is. He wouldn't mind having children, but he's ok without too. I wish I was there. Oh how I wish. Mark feels like we should just pray and seek direction right now. My prayer for direction has been that God would open the doors we are to go through, and close the ones we aren't. And how do you know if the door is open or closed if you don't look at it? So I have been on a fact finding mission to get information about all of our options. Mark feels like it's kind of a waste of time to walk down the hall checking doors if we don't have a direction. Neither of us thinks the other is wrong. We just have different perspectives. I think I have a hard time sitting still and waiting. I know that is something I need to work on...

In any event, Mark was not comfortable with trying to fit our meeting at the Pregnancy Crisis Center into our lunch hour, so we rescheduled it. It will be this coming Tuesday at 2:00 pm. Mark has most Tuesday afternoons off, so it won't mess with his work schedule at all. I will work through my lunch hour, and take a couple of hours of vacation, so I don't have to go back to work after the meeting.

Along these lines, I've begun working on a digital scrapbook of our lives together. While I'm excited about this scrapbook for several reasons. The ultimate purpose of the pages I'm creating is hopefully being used in an adoption portfolio, for expectant parents to look at to get to know us, and maybe decide they want us to raise their child. But I'll post more about this later.