Year in Review - February

Emma girl is still keeping us up at night.  Last weekend we gave up, and decided to make use of the awake time, and went to Wal-Mart at 1:30 am.  She was finally asleep by the time we got home.  She’s had a crazy appetite again, but I’ve noticed it drop off a bit in the last few days.  She’s REALLY grown this last month.  I took her for her 4 month well-baby visit on January 25, and she was just under 14 pounds.  She had crossed 2 lines on the growth chart in both height and weight.  She’s now pretty much right in the middle.

This month also brought her first cold.  I took her to the doctor on Feb 1, and she had gained 2/3 of a pound since the week before!  They said her lungs sounded great, and her ears were clear.  It was just a virus and it had to run its course.  I called after a week and they said to bring her back in.  Same thing, great lungs, clear ears, let it run its course.  Another week later we were back at the doctor.  This time we left with a prescription for amoxicillin.  She seems to be doing better, but has spent most of the month sleeping in the baby swing to keep her more upright.  In those 3 weeks, even being sick, she gained almost 2 pounds.  I’ve noticed that her clothes are starting to get a bit snug on her.  It's finally time to pull out the 3-6 month clothes, and even some of the 6-9.  She’s a growing girl!

She still doesn’t sit up unassisted for more than a couple of seconds before tipping over.  But really when given the opportunity to sit up, she generally makes her body stiff so that she can stand.  That’s where the action is.  She LOVES to stand up.  She holds pretty much all of her own weight, she just needs balance.  She’s starting to teethe.  Anything she gets her hands on (bib, clothes, blankets, toys, my clothes, my hair, etc) goes into her mouth in a flash.  She loves to suck on wash cloths.  She’s now eating oatmeal baby cereal, sweet potatoes, carrots, and pears.

Emma loves to smile and giggle.  She loves kisses and snuggles.  She doesn’t like it when she thinks she is alone.  She still yells a lot, but it doesn’t all sound mad now.  She likes to “sing” along with music, and she enjoys when we sing to her.  She still loves her bath time, but tolerates showers with me when we are in a hurry.

Year in Review - January

Because of the long blogging absence, I'm going to be doing a series of "Year in Review" posts about what has been going on in our lives over the last year.  As part of our open adoption agreement we send monthly update letters to our adoption agency to be given to Emma's birth parents should they want an update.  In January I started keeping copies of those.  (Why oh why didn't I keep them all along?)  I also keep all of our digital photos of Em divided up by month for easier backing up.  So hopefully the year in review won't be a huge task :)

January - 2010

New Years day brought Emma’s first giggle.  It was so sweet!  We were in a hotel in Boise, I was getting her ready for bed, and kissing on her cheeks and neck and she let out a giggle.  I did it again a couple of times, and she giggled too.  She didn't do it again for several weeks after that. 

She found her thumb.  It's SO sweet!!  She has started realizing she has control of her hands, and is reaching out to grasp things.  She puts her bib in her mouth all the time.  She loves to make spit bubbles.  She can sit up with assistance, and stay up without assistance for a few seconds before falling over.  She hasn’t had much interest in rolling over yet, but when she’s lying on her back, she’ll kick and kick until she’s almost turned herself in a circle.  She doesn’t mind tummy time as much as she used to.  She doesn’t enjoy it at all, but she tolerates it.  She enjoys kisses and snuggles.

I’m guessing she had a growth spurt recently.  It seemed she had a hollow leg, and we couldn’t get enough food down her!  During that time, she tried oatmeal baby cereal for the first time.  She didn’t know what I was doing to her, and she didn’t like it, but within a couple of days she got the hang of it.  She’s now eating it with sweet potatoes mixed in.  I weighed her to have info for our 4 month post placement visit.  She weighed 13.2 pounds, and was 24 inches long.

Silly little girl recognizes the camera now, and doesn't care one bit for it.  I think it's because she knows the flash is coming...  She can have the biggest smile on her face, but when she sees the camera she gets the "deer-in-the-headlights" look.  So many pictures this month she has the same sober expression on her face.

Can we build it? YES WE CAN!

I've become a HUGE fan of Ana-White.com formerly known as Knock Off Wood.  Ana is a stay at home mom who has started creating DIY furniture plans. She has a huge variety of hundreds of different plans.  Many items are Pottery Barn inspired.

I'm a fairly handy person.  I'm crafty.  I love to create.  Whether it's from wood, paper, camera, computer, fabric, yard... you get the idea.  So Ana's site is right up my alley.  I've built a few basic things before, and Mark and I built our fence in our back yard.  I love DIY projects.

 It's a dirty job... But I love it! 

My first project was this set of stacking cubes.  I'm a bit of a perfectionist.  They are not perfect.  So I got a little discouraged, and distracted.  They are close to being finished, but they are in the garage... There will be five total cubes.  One stack of two and one stack of three.

My next project was a step stool for Emma.  She isn't getting a lot of use out of it yet.  It has built in storage under the top step.  She loves to open and close it.  I have used it to get her closer to the sink to wash her hands.  I can see it being more useful in the future though.  I still need to decorate it.

Then I decided on the next project.  (Are you getting that I'm out of control here?) I made a table that was a modification/combination of a couple of different Ana plans. I made it smaller so Emma can use it now.  I'm very happy with how it turned out.  She really likes it.

I'm going to make another chair for her and modify it so there are arms on the chair to help keep her from falling over.  I've got the lumber in the garage, just need to get out there and build it!

I have a funny story about the paint.  Now that we are a one income family, budget is very important.  I'm going to be redecorating Em's room to be pink and brown.  I had a gallon of white paint that I bought on clearance last year for something else, then didn't end up using it.  Then last month I was browsing the "oops" paint at Home Depot (an Ana White recommendation) and saw a pint of red paint.  I didn't have anything to make with the red paint, but hey, it's $1.00 and she's always talking about mixing up her own crazy custom colors, so why not?  So, think back to your elementary days... what do red and white make?  You got it!  PINK!!
I mixed up the paint for that table with my red and white paint in a pickle jar and stirred it with a chop stick.  Some times ya gotta make due with what you have.  I think it turned out quite well!!

My current project is a Christmas gift.  Since the recipient is too young to be reading blogs, I can talk about it here (as long as her mom doesn't show her a picture).  It's a doll bed.  The plans for this bed are modeled after the most downloaded plan from Ana's website, The Farmhouse Bed.  I must admit, it's very cute.  I may have to make myself a farmhouse bed.  This one is still a work in progress.  I built it today.  I still have to sand, fill holes, sand again, prime and paint.  It will be painted "Pickle Jar Pink." Then I will make bedding for it.  I believe I have scraps of fabric so the quilt will be free.  I have foam for a mattress.  It's designed for an 18" doll. So she can use it for awhile.  This gift will have a large investment of time, but not much money at all.  I think that makes it even more special.  I'll try to remember to post a picture when it's complete.

Snow day

Three years ago I  made snowman kits to give to friends and family as gifts.  A snowman kit is wooden eyes, carrot nose, pipe, buttons, and carrot all on wooden dowels to poke into the snowman, and a fleece scarf.  All of these things are in a cute little burlap bag that I personalized.  I had extra supplies so I sold some through a forum I participate in as well as on ebay.  A co-worker wanted a bunch of them for her family, so I ordered more supplies.  She never came through.  So I boxed up the stuff and forgot about it.  My sister called a couple of weeks ago and asked how much it would be to make some more snowman kits for her to give to some people.  This reminded me that I had a bunch of supplies boxed up.  I dug through the boxes, and I found two kits, packaged and ready to mail.  I don't remember what happened, but I must have had an order fall through or something.  Tears came to my eyes when I saw the personalized name on one of the bags.  This was three years ago. God knew all along.

So, early last week I went to Once Upon a Child to look for a snowsuit and boots for Emma.  I succeeded in getting her a jacket, a snowsuit that looked brand new, and a hat all for $12.00.  I love a good deal!!  They didn't have boots her size.

Friday night, before I went to bed I looked outside to it had been snowing, and looked like it was starting to stick.  I immediately wanted to go to Wal-mart and get some boots so we could play in the snow in the morning.  It was quite late at night (or rather--early in the morning) so a trip to Wal-mart wasn't all to practical, so I went to bed.  Emma was still sleeping when I woke up, so I left Mark home with Em, and I went to get some snow boots.

We had a busy day ahead of us, and Emma was going to my sister's house for the afternoon.  This was the first time Emma had been with anyone but Mark or I since the end of August.  My mom had mentioned that the kids wanted to build a snowman.  I wanted so badly to be the one to build her first snowman with her.  So we hurried up and made it happen.  We all bundled up and went outside.  It did my heart good.  These are the memories I waited so long to start making.  I want to cry now just thinking about it.

Get ready for a blogging overload!

I've been gone too long.  I know, I know, I've said it before.  Let's see if I can get back into the habit!  I post everything on facebook these days.  But I know at one time I had several followers that were not facebook friends.  I haven't blogged regularly in so long, it's doubtful that anyone will even see this stuff for a few months, but I'm going to work this week on doing some "Year in Review" posts.

I even redecorated the blog for the occasion. :)  For now I have a princess whining in her crib.  I guess no early nap today.

Vacation scrapbook

I had a coupon for a free photo book. I thought I had till the end of the month to use it. I looked at it it yesterday, and saw that it expired today! So I had to hurry and scramble to get something put together. I see lots of things I would have changed if I had more time, but I got in just under the wire!

Click here to view this photo book larger

What's new?

Well, we've had some big changes in our house.  Where do I begin?  I guess we can start with the blogging absence.  My most recent blogging absence coincides directly with my return to full time work after Emma was born.  I was new at my job when we learned we had been chosen to adopt Emma.  My employer was amazing to work with in the time after Emma was born.  They gave me as much time as I needed before returning to work full time.  This was above and beyond, because they were not required to give me a single minute off as a new employee.  I was set to return to work full time on December 1. I struggled with going back to work and putting Emma in daycare.  I reviewed our budget.  I just couldn't see a way to make it without my income.  So back to work I went.

I really enjoyed my job.  It was a good fit for me.  Emma was in a great daycare three days a week that she loved.  They were taking good care of her.  The daycare was very close to my office.  The other two work days, I took her to my mom's house in the neighboring town.  Who could take better care of her than grandma?  My boss was great to let me come into work an hour late on the days I took her to my  mom's house, so I didn't have to leave so early in the morning.  What a great boss is that?

So everything is great, right? Well, mostly.  Except there were things that fell behind while I wasn't working full time.  So I would spend time catching up on one project.  While others fell behind.  Then I would move on to something else.  Then as with many small children in daycare, Emma got sick.  Over. and over. and over. again.  So here I am, torn.  I don't want to miss work and fall any further behind.  But this is my baby girl, and she needs me.  Or at least I feel like she needs me.  Maybe it was me that needed to be with her?  Then there's the house.  The only time the house was really cleaned was when we had a visit planned with the adoption agency case worker.  And my marriage.  Not that my marriage was bad, but it sure wasn't getting the attention it deserved.

As the months went by, I started getting very anxious and emotional.  It felt like I was living in a house of cards.  Like everything was going to fall down around me.  There was a constant feeling of impending doom.  I thought maybe it was the fact that Emma's adoption was not yet finalized, and some hiccups we were running into with the adoption agency.  However Emma's adoption was finalized in May.  The anxiety continued.  It got to the point that I broke down and called my doctor to explore the possibility of anti-depressants. 

Shortly after I took that step, I went to a Pampered Chef party at a friends house.  There was a lady there that I had never met.  I don't even remember what she spoke of exactly.  But she was talking about being a stay at home mom.  And how even when it looks like they aren't going to make it financially, God always meets their needs, and it is worth every sacrifice they make for her to be there to raise their children.  I told her that was my hope in another year or so when the adoption expenses are payed off.

I came home, started praying.  We did some creative financing, and within a couple of weeks had paid off the car and a couple of other smaller bills.  I started composing my letter of resignation.  The cloud over me started to lift.  Then Emma got sick again.  My boss told me I didn't need to be at work.  However I couldn't let myself get any further behind at work.  There was one thing I needed to get done.  I thought it would take no more than half a day, and I would go home to be with my girl.  Eleven hours later, I was leaving the office.  I was so upset that I had let that happen.  My daughter needed me, and I was at work for 11 hours!  I was bawling.  I came home that night and talked it over with Mark.  There simply wasn't enough of me to go around.  As much as I liked my job, and felt dedicated to it, it shouldn't be at the expense of my daughter, my marriage or my home.

July 2 I turned in a 30 day notice.  My boss tried to find other ways that I could do both, and spend more time with my daughter.  I really felt like I needed to just be at home with Emma for now.  Maybe I will find a way to work from home later.  But for now, I just need to be Emma's mom and Mark's wife.  Then she asked if I would be flexible with that 30 day notice while they looked for a replacement.  There were a couple of different replacements chosen that didn't work out.  So my 30 day notice got a lot closer to 60 days.  But last week I finished out my job.  I put in some LONG hours as I approached the end.  I'm glad I did.  I feel good about it.  I didn't get to everything I wanted to.  But I did what I could.

Now I'm home with my girl.  Who is sick.  Again.  Good thing I had no pressure to figure out what to do with her so I could go to work today.  I just stayed home with her.  I'm feeling good, and didn't end up with anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds.  I've also had eczema on my hands for about a year and a half that has cleared up on it's own now.  How cool is that!?  I do miss my co-workers, and the individuals they provide support services for, but that doesn't compare to being with Emma.  I know eventually I'll look for some time to myself.  We'll cross that bridge when we get there.  For now I'm happy.

That's what's new here.  Next time I'll post pictures.  You're not going to believe this, but Emma is fast approaching one year old!  She's walking and jabbering.  I love this girl!!
 

I interrupt this blogging absence...

I interrupt this blogging absence to say a happy birthday to my Mama Lucy in heaven.  

(Yes, the baby that looks like a boy is me)

Depending on your level of Niki knowledge, you may or may not know about Mama Lucy.  So for those of you who don't know, please allow me to introduce you to my first mom, Lucille Sharon.  Mama Lucy passed away when she was 24 years old after a battle with cancer, leaving me to be raised by her sister, now my mom.  (Got the connections?  Clear as mud?  Good.)

Tuesday, September 7, would have been her 54th birthday.   I will be the first to tell you I had a great childhood.  I was raised in a wonderful, loving family by great parents.  But oh how there are days that I wish she could see.  I so wish she could have seen me graduate from high school, or get married, or meet my little Emma Lucille.  Thankfully I know the day will come, that I will see her again.  But until then...  Happy birthday in Heaven Mama Lucy.



P.S. There have been some major changes in my life.  I can't promise that will mean more frequent blogging, but I'm fairly confident it will.  I'll be back to update on that in just a little bit.

Forever Family

Seven years ago, Mark and I became a family.  Most people don't see it that way.  In their minds it takes a child to make a family.  This simply isn't true.  We spent six and a half years as a family of two.  Our desire (well, mostly mine) was to add a child to that family for that entire six and a half years.  But I truly treasure that time with the two of us.  Mark is my best friend.

Seven and a half months ago the baby we hoped and dreamed of for so many years was placed into our arms.  In that moment our hearts knew we were now a family of three.

While our hearts knew this, it took the legal adoption process a little while to catch up. :)   We had some hiccups along the way with our adoption agency.  That is a topic for another time.  Two weeks ago, we went to court to finalize our baby girl's adoption.  There were more hiccups with the agency.  The judge approved the adoption as of that day, pending receipt of some additional paperwork from the adoption agency and Idaho Department of Health and Welfare.  As much as we wanted to celebrate that day, we couldn't do it.  We went to breakfast, but it just didn't feel like celebration day.  After all of the loss, and loss of control with infertility and pregnancy loss, I was just waiting for something else to go wrong, for everything to unravel.

This past Friday, I opened the mailbox to find papers from the attorney.  Our certified papers.  We are forever.  The tears came.  Finally, we are free to celebrate!

On that note, it's almost tomorrow.  Tomorrow is Monday... I better get to bed.  Goodnight world!

We Are the Truth

 This information is re-posted (ie, copied almost word for word-only the names of the innocent have been changed) from Wendy and Becky.  Thanks for the info ladies!


We Are The Truth – An Adoption Blogger Day: To ensure the world knows about every successful adoption, on Thursday, April 15, 2010 blog about your adoption or the adoption of someone you know. It doesn’t matter if your adoption is with Russia, domestic or otherwise international. Let the world know your truth!


If you are here, you most likely know that our daughter Emma was brought into our lives through the miracle of adoption. There are, of course, exceptions to the successful adoption story. But these are just that. Exceptions.

"We are the Truth" was begun after a little boy, Artyem, was adopted by a family in the United States and then "sent back" to Russia. It is important to understand that adoptive children have the same "percentage of problems" that biological children have. However, if an adopted child has issues it is "because he was adopted." Have you ever heard someone say, "Well, that child had a lot of problems but can you blame him? He was a biological child." Adoption becomes the "reason" even when it very well may not be. Biological parents abandon their children as well.

The outrageous treatment of Artyem by his adoptive family has rightfully resulted in outrage by the Governments of Russia and the United States and all who care about children. The tragedy has cast a light on intercountry adoption that says it is not safe, the system failed and adopted children cause insurmountable problems. The heartbreak of Artyem Saviliev’s abandonment has once again elevated a singular incident to a level which may result in the suspension of intercountry adoption. Suspending adoption, even temporarily, will only cause thousands of children to suffer the debilitating effects of life in an orphanage.

You, the community of adoptees, adoptive parents, adoptive grandparents, child welfare professionals and child advocates know that the outrageous and indefensible actions of one parent are not indicative of how children are treated by adoptive families. You know that families who encounter difficulties do not simply abandon their child. You know that help is available, that solutions are found and that families can thrive. And you know that suspending adoption does not protect children but only subjects them to the depravity of an institution…and an entire life without a family.

You, the adoption community know the truth. You live the truth. You are the truth.

Join our campaign to bring the truth to light and help children in need find a permanent and safe family.

You can help! Please:

(1) Sign the letter to President Medvedev and President Obama: The letter asks both Presidents to ensure that intercountry adoption continues uninterrupted and to aggressively investigate and prosecute anyone involved in the abuse of children. You can sign anytime, but doing so before Tuesday night would help us get the letters to both Presidents before President Medvedev leaves the U.S. Click here to sign the letter.

(2) And then PLEASE consider linking to my blog from your blog. Tell the story of our adoption of Emma or of your adoption or of another adoption you know of!  Share how you have witnessed her life joining to our lives. Tell everyone who reads your blog that adoption is not what this ONE story has painted it to be. It is the exception NOT the rule.

Please help! We don't want children to be hurt by one family's mistake.

(One handed here.. There's only one reason these days that I would be up at 2:30 am)


Look at the difference in Emma between these pictures of Em with the same sun glasses on....

Return from a long blogging absence,

Here it is, my come back tour.  This is not my first blogging absence, and certainly won't be the last.  Emma is very content in the tub right now jabbering, kicking and splashing.  Now before you go calling CPS on me, I am sitting on the floor next to the tub shielding my laptop from the splashes.  I've been pretty good keeping up on facebook.  But I can do short updates one-handed.  The blog.  It requires two hands.  I simply don't have access to both of my hands at the same time too much anymore when I'm home.  Not that I'm complaining.  PLEASE don't think I'm complaining.

Our baby girl is six months old today.  Can you believe it?  I can't.  Well, I guess in some ways I can.  In some ways I can hardly remember our lives without her.  In other ways it seems like just yesterday we got that midnight call that she had made her entrance into the world.

She is constantly changing before our eyes.  It's not till I look back at the pictures that I realize HOW MUCH she's changed.  As part of our adoption, we had to have 3 followup or "Post Placement" visits from our social worker.  We had to update the social worker with new pictures at each visit.  So I compiled two "picture pages" for her at each visit.

These first two pages were from 1-2 months given to our social worker at her two month visit.

These next two pages were at our second visit at four months old.  They are pictures from 2-4 months.

These last two pages were from our final (yes FINAL) visit with the social worker just last week.  They contain pictures from 4-6 months.

Isn't it crazy how much she's changed?  Sadly, she's been sick with one thing or another for much of the last two months. (Back to typing one handed now since someone doesn't want to go to bed tonight).

So, here are some facts about our girl:

•  she weighs 16 pounds, and is 25 1/2 inches long.
• she has no interest in rolling over.  none.
• she has two teeth; got them one and two weeks ago. she's done great with teething so far.
• she likes her big girl food. She's currently eating oatmeal cereal, rice cereal, sweet potatoes, bananas, pears, peas and carrots.
• she is very interested in food we are eating.
• she normally (although not tonight) puts herself to sleep at night. she still sleeps in mommy and daddy's room.  I think that's more for us than her though.
• she had a major growth spurt, and finally got out of newborn clothes when she was 4 months old.  Now she's in 6 month clothes!
• she notices everything around her.
• she recognizes that she knows some people, and not others, and she's starting to be very leery of strangers.
• she loves kisses and snuggles.

and lastly for tonight...

• she is asleep... so I'm going to get her to bed

Poor sick baby girl at the doctor. Lungs and ears are clear. Looks like it's just her first cold.

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Look who is FOUR months old. I'm posting from my phone now. I'll have to come back another time soon to give ao update.